Obsession. Passion. Jealousy. Affection. Love can ignite a lot of crazy emotions in us. And whether single or in a relationship, we all have people in our lives we share these emotions with. This Valentine’s Day, which color of love do you fall into?
Mania
Mania is the more obsessive type of love that is often characterized by jealousy, possessiveness and fear. The manic lover often gets emotionally wrapped up in all the little things. Manic lovers also tend to assume the worst in the relationship: Their partner is cheating on them, doesn’t love them anymore or is mad at them.
“You need to be conscious of why you feel that way, of what past experiences may have caused you to have these feelings, and explore your sense of self.”
Tiffany Juterbock, certified loveologist and executive assistant to Dr. Ava Cadell, founder of Loveology University
Storge
Storge is love based on friendship. Storge lovers crave a relationship built on closeness, affection and trust, and tend to thrive as couples.
“Storge is a dynamic that arises with true compatibility. With friendship at the core, that is, they actually like each other as people and share some values, interests and life vision.”
Annette Carpien, certified master relationship coach and senior trainer with the Relationship Coaching Institute
Eros
Eros is passionate, lustful and erotic – physical love that makes you weak in the knees. This is the kind of love that makes your relationship seem like a scene from “Fatal Attraction.” An Eros lover can also be seen as a hopeless romantic. One of the downsides? Eros love doesn’t usually last.
“Eros love is the image portrayed in Hollywood tabloids. High-intensity sexiness and passion as the main dish on the platter of love and marriage.”
Annette Carpien, certified master relationship coach and senior trainer with the Relationship Coaching Institute
Pragma
Pragma is practical love. Seeking a relationship that will work, pragmatic lovers look for stability, compatibility and logic in love. These lovers are very careful about choosing partners and stress similarities in beliefs, values, background and interests.
“Traditionally, people have married for property or for social status or for the good of the family, and love really never entered the picture. I think in many ways making a decision about finding a partner for practical reasons may be a very honest and open way of approaching a relationship.”
Dr. Susan Milstein, GW human sexuality professor
Agape
Agape is a self-sacrificing love. Agape lovers are somewhat rare – they selflessly give themselves to their partners. They may also be seen, however, as submissive.
“Ah yes, the martyrs. What is up with us? As women, we are naturally born mothers – nurturing, protecting and loving. The key to making such a relationship work is to find your own voice in it; to care about your own life and goals just as much as your partner’s.”
Stacey Wolf, astrologer for Cosmopolitan and author of, “Never Throw Rice at a Pisces”
Ludus
One word for Ludus lovers: players. These lovers prefer to play the field and choose quantity over quality. Love isn’t all that serious and emotions need to be reined in. These recreational relationships are the fun, short-term relationships often seen between teenagers and college students.
“These kinds of relationships work best only if both partners know that it’s just fun and short-term. If you both are on the same page, then it is absolutely appropriate at certain times in life.”
David Steele, founder of the Relationship Coaching Institute and author of, “Conscious Dating: Finding the Love of Your Life in Today’s World”