See the female sex columnist’s column here.

On weekends when darkness falls, students’ hands are constantly on electronic devices searching for someone to spend the night with. With text messages, BBMs, Facebook chat, or even two-way pagers, everyone has their own method of contacting Mr. or Ms. Right Now. But take a lesson from those who have learned the hard way: Sometimes it is beneficial to slow things down.

Last semester I was fortunate enough to be presented with a number of sexual opportunities. A new freshman looking for her first college fling and some more experienced seniors were all finding things they liked in me. The opportunity was bewildering – I was being offered sex, no strings attached, from girls whose paths would never cross.

If you had told me then that there was such a thing as too much sex, I would have hastily denied it. That is, until I realized, maybe I’m just a bit more naive than I thought. Throughout my escapades it never occurred to me that the girls on my booty call list could be using me as well, that the girl I call Number One might have a list of her own.

One Thursday evening out, I spotted Number One outside a club. She had texted me earlier saying she was tired and wanted to leave soon, which I interpreted to mean that she wanted to go home and get tangled in the sheets. I can’t say I wasn’t pumped, until I walked inside and saw my Number One all over a random – at least to me – guy in an Ed Hardy T-shirt.

I don’t fashion myself as an emotional guy. But I was annoyed, to say the least. Leaving the scene in a cab alone, I realized I had never anticipated Number One would get with someone else. I had been thinking of girls like On-Demand television – there when I wanted them and otherwise just waiting around for me to call. But that is simply not the case, as I found out all too well.

In the end, when it comes to potential hook-up situations, girls have just as much control as boys. They are not sitting at home waiting for a call. And a “sure thing” may have three more sure things waiting around for her. So do yourself a favor and talk to your potential partner. You don’t have to put a ring on her finger, but you do have to communicate.