“It doesn’t do good to become dependent on anyone in this life,” says the title character (Jude Law) early on in “Alfie” (Paramount). This is one of the many slick nuggets of advice he dispenses while narrating his bumbling life as a 30-something British bachelor in Manhattan. Alfie has it all – expensive clothes, a nice car (or at least, access to one as a limo driver for a middle-aged Chinese stereotype) and more beautiful women than most men meet in their lifetime.
There’s neglected trophy wife Dorie (Jane Krakowski, best known as the slutty secretary on “Ally McBeal”), homey single mom Julie (Marisa Tomei), wealthy older woman Liz (Susan Sarandon), damaged party girl Nikki (Sienna Miller) and a few others whose names Alfie’s already forgotten. He’s not heartless – he just can’t commit.
Of course, inconsiderate playboys always get their comeuppance, and Alfie’s comes in not just one but a series of painful surprises. We know it’s serious when he starts having virility problems, a not-so-subtle metaphor for the decay creeping into his hedonistic lifestyle. Alfie starts to wonder if bouncing from one woman to another really is what it’s “all about.”
If this sounds like familiar territory, it is. In an age when even presidential candidates are suspected of getting Botox, it’s hardly shocking to suggest that men are as insecure about aging as women. But while the subject matter may have been less tired when the original “Alfie” came out in 1966, the new version fails to give the storyline some timely verve.
A less than interesting conflict makes Alfie’s conversion from buffoon to whimpering, sensitive guy seem forced and unrealistic, and it’s clearly inevitable from the moment he appears onscreen. The only serious problems Alfie faces are glossed over too quickly, making his eventual breakdown come off as out of character. Distracting visuals and constant tonal shifts make it hard to follow along with Alfie’s emotional changes.
It is the excellent acting, however, that provides “Alfie’s” saving grace. The always-great Law manages to give his character some credible depth, striking the perfect balance between lovable and detestable. The film’s leading ladies are also highly entertaining. But while “Alfie” may leave you amused, it’ll also leave you without much new to think about.
“Alfie” opens in Washington, D.C. Friday, Nov. 5.
