Writer, director and star of his own film, Josh Kornbluth knows more about working as a temp than most people would ever care to learn. This knowledge will come in handy for Kornbluth soon enough, because, judging by Haiku Tunnel, his career in film will be very short-lived.

Compiling material from several of his somehow popular one-man monologues, Josh Kornbluth and brother/co-writer/co-director Jacob Kornbluth created Haiku Tunnel (Sony Pictures Classics), the most ghastly, tepid rehash of every office comedy ever possibly inflicted on mankind.

The story is that of an office temp who decides to go permanent. It drags along through the most hackneyed, over-the-top comedy seen since Mom and Dad Save the World. And as leading man, Josh Kornbluth’s broad, unfunny acting style brings to mind only the worst of high school theater.

The film’s supporting cast manages to encapsulate every annoying stereotype expected in an office. Yet somehow, despite their own acting disabilities, they find ways to make these characters even more annoying than previously imagined.

The only thing more unbelievable than the idea that someone thought this movie had potential is the romance between Kornbluth and the business world equivalent of a gangster movie gun moll: sly, seductive and completely enamored with tax law.

As Kornbluth rushes from one familiar scenario to the next, lying about his occupation in order to have sex, forgetting to mail his boss’ letters for days and constantly whining about trying to finish his novel, the audience sits back and waits for 90 grueling minutes to tick by.

No laughter. No tears. Only pain and the realization that almost anyone, no matter how unoriginal and unfunny, can sell a movie to an unwitting studio
Haiku Tunnel is in theaters Friday.